This week we are shining a spotlight on Dementia Action Week which runs from the 19th May – 25th May in association with the Alzheimer’s Society, aiming to raise awareness and the importance of early dementia diagnosis. This campaign coincides with the paperback publication of Grandad’s Star, a touching story written by Frances Tosdevin and illustrated by debut illustrator Rhian Stone.
This book tells the story of a little girl whose Grandad is a famous astronomer and her own personal guide to the stars. One day Grandad starts to forget things and when her mother explains what is happening the little girl decides to use their stories to reach her grandad again.
Frances Tosdevin has written this beautiful piece for us to share explaining how dementia touched her family, and how the experience inspired her to write this important picture book for young readers.
“As a child in the 60’s and 70’s, I was obsessed by the space programme, and my family followed the Apollo space missions with enthusiasm and wonder. I even wrote to NASA in 1969, asking for a signed photo of Neil Armstrong (the first man on the moon), and to my incredulous delight, one day a large envelope from NASA— addressed to me— arrived in the post— inside was a ‘signed’ photo of Neil Armstrong. I could not have been happier, or prouder (or more surprised)!
When my elderly mum developed signs of dementia in her nineties, she became forgetful. At first, this was not a major problem, and we supported her to live ‘independently’ in her own home. However, independent living became impossible after a fall, a spell in hospital and a sudden worsening of her cognitive abilities— meaning we could not safely leave her alone at any time. As a family, we made the difficult decision that moving our mother into a care home would be for the best. She adapted very well to this move and was soon enjoying a busy schedule of crossword mornings and Scrabble afternoons; there was always something to do and someone to do it with.
I’ve calculated that I visited my mother around 1400 times whilst she was in the care home. Over nearly five years I saw many people (both in the main care home setting and subsequently in the dementia unit) who were affected by dementia— from mild memory loss to full-blown Alzheimer’s. I also saw how carers and specialists found ways to connect with them, and how simple things like playing an old film— or a song from the past — could connect with people and ‘awaken’ them. People who had been slumped and sleepy, were suddenly sitting up and engaging with films, music and songs. In fact, music felt like a magic power—a way to cut through the confusion of dementia and connect with the young and vibrant soul of the person inside. Words from songs many decades old would trip faultlessly off the tongues of residents who were otherwise hard to reach. It was a miraculous transformation…until the music and the song ended, and the magic wore off.
It is true that in the dementia unit there was pathos and sadness—but there was also much humour and happiness. She was forever living in the present moment. For which we were all, actually, very, very grateful it could have been so much worse.
Because of these personal experiences of dementia, I knew I wanted to write a picture book about dementia. But I needed a way into the story, or a ‘hook’— and this evaded me for a long time. Unfortunately, I suffer from historic and persistent insomnia. During bad nights, I refer to the stars as “my friends, the stars”— because, when the world is sleeping but you are not, they are a constant, kindly and non-judgemental presence. They are there when I need something to make me feel less hopeless; less useless; less out of kilter with the rest of the world— with those lucky people who find sleep at the right time in the night.
On one such night of not sleeping, I went to the window once again. I greeted my friends, the stars! In the middle of the night, for no good reason whatsoever, I was trying to recall one of two things… either the Latin botanical name of a plant (I am a stickler for unambiguous classification and love learning all the Latin names) OR the name of an occasional presenter on Gardeners’ World (can you tell I have a ‘thing’ about plants?!) … only I couldn’t… I couldn’t recall the Latin name/presenter’s name that I was trying to bring to the foreground of my mind… I KNEW that I knew it… and that I’d recall it as soon as I got up in the morning. But at 3.30 am, could I recall it? Nope, not at all. I could not. I felt beaten and useless. I looked at my BESTEST star friend, you know— that really bright one— I’m not certain what its name is but perhaps it is Venus? — I looked at it and thought memories are like the twinkles of stars… sometimes bright and sometimes dim. And in that millisecond— in that dark, lonely, pit of a sleepless night— I knew I’d had an “Aha!” moment and found the way into my dementia story. Several things had collided in one starlit moment: my desire to write a dementia story, an especially bright and twinkly star, and my nighttime failure to recall something that I knew that I knew!
And a bit like the Big Bang, I had the beginnings of a story…”
– Frances Tosdevin
We hope you enjoyed our May newsletter. You can find Grandad’s Star at your local book shop or library, or order online HERE , and you can find downloadable activity resources relating to this book here.
Look out for Frances and Rhian on Instagram, and don’t forget to follow Rocket Bird Books.